4.) Stop the inner dialogue.
Instead of fully listening to another, many people start formulating what they are going to say even before the other person has finished speaking.
Stop the inner talk and count to 3 before speaking when you think they're through. This ensures they are finished and allows you to respond to ALL that was said.
5.) Say "I" instead of "you".
In a disagreement, refrain from using the word "you". This sounds too much like blaming. Instead use phrases starting with "I". Be careful of using this in such a way that it still comes across as a criticism, such as "I feel you are doing a lousy job." Instead say something like, "I am concerned with the quality of work we are producing."
6.) Avoid the word "but".
Using "but" negates everything said preceding it. Instead, use a bridge word like "and". For instance, if you say, "I like what you did, but it needs improvement", all they hear is "it needs improvement". Better to say, "I like what you did AND it needs improvement."
7.) Say it the way you want it.
The subconscious mind cannot process a negative. If I say to you, "Don't think of a blue tree", you will have to think of a blue tree in order to process what I said. So tell them how you really want it instead of what you don't want.